Faces are what I used to distinguish an identity. Two eyes, nose and mouth - like a mathematical equation that equals an ancestry. A friend of mine never met her father. I asked her, would she rather him have been around and abusive, or as absent as he has chosen to be? Her answer moved me: "I would have liked to understand my face."
But lineage is a tricky thing. The research for the WM2017 "The Download / Deep Work" Collection has given me more questions than answers. In a sense, we all come to earth and receive a download. From the abyss of yet-to-being, to a moving thing with a soul + identity. Our cultural identity is software that we download when we enter the system out from the womb.
This software is what I (and many others around me and before me) am trying to disrupt, deconstruct so that we can be free. This software tell us what time is: the year of our Lord 2017 or w/e, that there are 12 months in a year, that a day starts at 12:00am. All of this affects our perception of life, and has been a result of colonization process that started a long time ago (we use the Gregorian/Roman calendar). In my previous collections (WM Theories + Cascade Collection) I explored time as non-linear, and visualization as a super power. Thanks to my Yoga Teacher, I was informed about the measurement of time of the Dogon Tribe, which supported me with an even better articulation of what it means to rethink our perception of time.
I am unpacking the notion of linear time in order to more clearly experience the present. I want to experience new ideas and realizations about the life-death-life cycle, ones that place me in a continuum instead of a start-finish ideology. I want to view my face as a portal to my ancestors, something I can see through, so this is an ideology I can use to more easily access my greatness.
When I was younger, I felt and took on my mother's frustration and my fathers posture. Habits, and the way I've responded to situations in my life were based on trying to please my mother, or remain in the favour of my elders. From my Father, I absorbed a sense of aloneness, and sensitivity. I became self-critical, self-absorbed, and an over achiever. Like all parents in this imperfect world, they carried their trauma through their lives and it permeated their parenting. Their parents did the same to them, and this pattern goes back and back and back. I am so grateful that my parents realized the abuse they experienced as children must stop with them. Thanks to their effort, I now have a more solid ground to stand on; I have grown to find my own way to inner peace. I can choose empathy instead of judgement, and I can forgive others, knowing that in turn I forgive myself.
Knowing/learning what I know now about trauma and abuse, the choice to remain hurt is my own. Each present moment is a chance for me to realize that suffering is a part of life that I can learn from. Also, I know that this intergenerational violence is a direct result of violent colonialism, slavery and racism, and toxic masculinity/patriarchy. Therefore I cannot even fault my grandparents, or my great-great-great-grandparents - violence as a form of discipline is all they knew, and it was true for them.
Fortunately for me, I was manifested in this now, 'a womyn of colour' in 'the queen's Canada' in the 'most multi-cultural city in the world' as a 'millenial' with the agency to make all sorts of self-discoveries and realizations. What I experience now is the sensation of choice. Not just who/how I want to portray myself, but how I want to experience time, and what I want to feel, from moment to moment. All of the choices are mine - how to react to challenge, how to face my fears, even how to view history.
I am learning to meet my suffering with acceptance and empathy. I feel that every time I dive deep into my pain, my intergenerational trauma, I am able to uninstall the software, and return directly to the source of peace and love.
It is with this energy, and a consciousness of respect for the natural environment, that I present Wild Moon Jewelry 2017 Collection "DEEP WORK / DOWNLOAD". An eco-conscious collection that incorporates recycled beads and recycled silver as a celebration of respect, integrity and unconditional love from the source of life energy, Mother Earth. Big thanks to the team who helped to develop the imagery and inspiration around the jewelry especially the Womb Circle group members, Mecha Clarke, Ayisha Gariba, Rais Clarke-Mendes, Anthony Gebrehiwot, Knicco Hodge, Jade Lee Hoy, and all my fam & friends who supported me to grow this year! In addition, special thanks to the United Nations Association in Canada Green Corps Program for supporting this collection! My heart overflows with gratitude for you all who have contributed in your own ways to this soul translation.
Talk to the plants, as them what they think about the world. Talk to your body, ask it what needs to change. Life force is everywhere - running in lanes we don’t see. The litter blocks the flow - the litter in the rivers, in the underground water ways, like emotional blockages - preventing us from realizing the full potential of our lives.